Be-Tween

Not Summer now but not quite Autumn...the World rushing fiercely toward Winter Holidays leaving some of Us torn between Moving Forward or Hanging Back...holding onto the remnants of the Year.

That's where I am...be-tween time. Like the last green tomato in the garden...do I Let It Go or hold out in the Hope it will turn red before the Wheel Turns?

Deja vu creeps into my thoughts - haven't I done this before? Felt this way before? Repeated the same Thinking, the same Moves, the same Patterns and Procrastinations?

I learned Long Ago (and do truly believe) that the only way to Change is to Do Differently...no amount of Thinking, Feeling or Saying makes It different until I Change What I Do.

The Wheel Turns

What a strange Summer it has been: cool and damp; slow now fast. August segmented in thirds, thinking ahead to Winter already.

Much activity on The Farm: watching Green Tomatoes and secretly hoping for Red scorching days; new Roosters to man the Coop (Stu and Lucky, gifts from a Stranger now Friend); Japanese Beetle Patrol abandoned and destruction accepted...

Today's Agenda includes processing 10# of Michigan Blueberries (the Bubba Gump of Berries: jam, jelly, muffins, pies, tarts, turnovers....) and making Freezer Pickles that promise Crispness come January.

Big Art still beckons although I manage little art through the lens.

Losing Ground

A recent, though work related, visit to The Japanese Garden at Rotary Gardens, Janesville, Wisconsin, drove home the point that I have been playing Hurry Up and Wait lately. Its a Family Tradition, I'm afraid - the Scurrying and Worrying and Future Living. Instead of Relishing the Moments I found myself swept up in the Priorities of Others with a good dose of Meeting Others' Needs. No wonder I have but a few photos and a sore leg for my efforts.

My Studio remains untended. Best Intentions waylaid by the game....and yet another course of antibiotics. I suspect that there is a Connection between the months of feeling Cranky and Sick and my Avoidance of Making.

I did receive Book + Art by Dorothy Simpson Krause and am awaiting a Blurb copy of her artist book Losing Ground . Surely the Universe is sending me a Message....Losing Ground - yes, quite possibly.

The Heat

Gardening like mad here, trying to beat The Heat which is forecast to arrive next week. Great Rains and Strong Storms have reduced the peonies to masses of soggy diapers...and second season Delphiniums to toppled Greek Columns....but the Lilies are coloring up and the Echinacea has many buds....Summer is Coming.
The best part about The Heat is that I can retreat to the coolness of The Studio. I mention that here only to spur some Accountability for my Intention. The Studio must be cleaned and sorted and arranged...its been two years too long since I let the Art out of my Head...the few dribs and drabs don't count...Time to Make is upon me.

In Search of a Tiny Adventure

Wet and windy here but bloom perseveres....as do I. Still not quite 100% although the ennui that plagued me this year seems to be waning.
The Man and I marked our 24th year together and 10 years of marriage - nothing spectacular but the Full Moon.
Summer Heat is forecast for late next week which bodes well for the Vegetable Garden - transplanted and seeded and waiting for Warmth.
Treated myself to three popular artsy books and I can recommend one: Book + Art: Handcrafting Artists' Books by Dorothy Simpson Krause
http://www.amazon.com/Book-Art-Handcrafting-Artists-Books/dp/1600611540/ref=wl_it_dp?ie=UTF8&coliid=I1IH0OUHGH1OBT&colid=2HMK7JLIT4H7A
The artist/author never fails to intrigue me.

I think Intrigue is the element missing for me lately. I am a naturally curious sort (others mistake it for nosy-ness); the days have melted together in a Great Blob of Sameness. The Gardens give some respite but not enough. I need, at least, a Tiny Adventure.

Inspiration

Despite the cold, wet, windy day today I headed to Hornbaker's Gardens for some inspiration and (limited) retail plant therapy. It was worth it although I was soaked and chilled to the bone - and, of course, I now feel a hypochondriac cold coming on.
Hornbakers is known for Iris, Daylilies and Hostas. Their display gardens are drool worthy.

It was a very long week and this brief escape was a tiny antidote.

Promise Kept

We Midwesterners talk (i.e. complain) about the weather.... a lot. But the Truth is that we Live for the change of Seasons. Knowing simply that Things Will Change - that the Wheel turns - is often the only thing that ensures we get up each morning.
The rain has finally stopped here - great buckets of it - and the Gardens are starting to bloom. The Promise has been kept as evidenced by the giant egg of tree peony bloom in my garden. Oh yes, we have the daffs, the tulips, the common, but pretty. signs of Hope that poke out defiantly against the Snow and Wind. It is these few days in May when nights are cool to chilly and days are bright and Shiny that we Middle ones know that Life begins again.


I've been sick all year so far - a combination of exposure, bad pharmaceuticals, an absence of Good Practice, and a lethargy that allows me to complete the should do of paying job, laundry and daily chores but not the Must Do of creative introspection, soul satisfying contact and the wild abandon of making.

This month I taught a child to make her own book. I endured kind, but mostly patronizing, attention to my excitedly voiced creative ideas about Projects. I've day dreamed and night dreamed about making.....all a necessary prelude I guess.

Today the Oriole in the Orchard is calling to me: get up, get up, get up...begin again.